A perspective on Father's Day

Last night Rita and I were preparing for a family get-together for Father's Day.  The invitations were called in, the meal was planned.  Who is bringing what.  What cleaning and organizing we need to do.  Where we will all sit.  Etc.  Etc.
When it was done I sat in a bit of reverie, longing for the days when I took the boys camping and fishing.  Longing for that innocence and love.  We are all grown up now.  Even me.
I started going down the road of regrets.  Of hurts.  Of pain.  Of bad choices.  Of missed opportunities.  It can be overwhelming.
I chased my reverie back into a more positive thought process.  Dragging myself down does me no good.  It certainly doesn't help.  Don't get me wrong.  Remembering my errors, my bad choices, can help me from doing them again.  But getting into a funk can be harmful.  So I remember it with a large dose of the good stuff too.  A broader picture of myself, of my kids, where we are, and where we are going.  There are many things I would change if I could, but I can't.
I started thinking of my own dad.  I wish I had known him better.  Oh the regrets start to rear their ugly heads again.  So I think of the good times.
Of catching and cooking up my first fish.  Of making "tractors" out of Mom's wooden thread spools, a match stick, a button, and a rubber band.  Oh the fun.
I remember my chickens.  And the ducks.  And my hamster.  And my fish tank.  It goes on. 
I remember Dad waking me up many times at four AM so I could get my newspaper route done before going to school.  Dad was proud of me.
In the same way, I am so very proud of all my kids.  They make choices that I worry about.  But I am proud of them all.  Every one.  Each has his or her own struggles they have to get through, but it will hone them.  I worry and pray.  But I am proud.
There are things of my own childhood I would change, but it would have changed me.  Who I am now.  And this is where God wants me to be. 
I am proud of myself, too. 
Saturday will be fun.  Memories relived.  Jokes told.  Politics discussed.  Bellies filled.  Beer consumed.  All in all, life is pretty damn good.  David